Life is created of so many different facets. I kind of see it like a pizza right and a special one where each slice has different toppings. Then let’s say that each slice of this pizza has to be kept warm, so you have to keep warming a slice up individually and you’re constantly trying to make sure that each slice is the perfect temperature and about the same.
Wow I really could have used a much better simile, but the point is that life’s different slices all need to be balanced. They require your time and your energy and need attention. They can be your family, education, work, friends, spirituality and more. There could even be different sections in each of these areas. For example, work might include your own business that your trying to build and also your 9 – 5.
The older you get, the more slices there seem to be and that’s the reality. So I wanted to think about how can we learn to balance. Sacrificing one thing for another can sometimes seem like the easiest thing to do, but you don’t want to let go of something worthwhile just because it’s hard.
Sometimes life and these different slices of life can be easier to balance, but for the harder parts where time seems to slip, like sand in your hands, (oh yes, a much better simile) I would recommend time allocating and being very strict with it. Decide how much time your going to give to each slice and why; don’t waver from it. Let your yes be your yes so to speak. Obviously it may be unavoidable sometimes for something to slip from your attention. Don’t beat yourself up about it. Just pick it up again and work on filling in the gaps.
Another key piece of advice, is to prioritise, and think about the long term. Think about what you want to be flourishing in the future. What is important to you and what will give massive returns for the energy that your putting in. Then focus in on those areas and decide which areas (if any) that you need to cut.
Here’s what some other women, currently saving themselves, had to say:
TOYIN (in her twenties) – “if you’re religious pray, God knows what’s in store for you and how to heal you and what to do in all circumstances. If you not religious there are other angles for example if you’re at work and stressed/under pressure, speak to your supervisor or manager and be honest.
Be honest with your friends. They may not always appreciate what you say but be honest. Don’t force anything just be yourself and don’t apply too much pressure to your relationships.
Take time out. Go to the gym. Exercise is good for your physical and mental health.
Also have fun! Eat chocolate, go for a walk and listening to music can make a difference.
Try and organise as much as you can. Make a provisional plan for the week, just try your best. Even if you don’t get everything done.”
DEBORAH (in her twenties) – “its important to have a strong support system that you can talk to and offload on. A work friend to talk about work struggles and friend to talk to about relationship struggles can ease the pressure off as sometimes we can get caught in our own head.
Find things that work for you to relax, listening to music, cooking or going out with friends can help to clear my head. Find a routine for you that helps to ease stress.
Easing pressure from relationships comes from communication and knowing yourself more. As much as you build relationships, build yourself in the process. Know your hobbies and who you are outside of the people around you.”
To summarise here are some of the key steps to the balancing act of life:
- Plan your time and stick to it as much as possible.
- Think about what you want to prioritise.
- Talk to someone; have a support system.
- Do things to help you relax, whether that’s listening to music or going out with friends!
Thanks for reading,
Zahrah (Author of ‘And So She Saved Herself’)